Truer Truth
One of the many things that I have learned over the years about the art of writing songs is that each song seems to have something that it wants to say. Perhaps it sounds strange to speak of songs as if they are alive, but that is part of what they (the songs) have taught me and continue to teach me. It is as if each song that I work with has a life of its own, and, thus, something specific that it wants to say. That is a very different approach to songwriting than my early understanding of the art. When I started writing songs many years ago, my approach was to begin with something that I wanted to say. The process often felt very forced and difficult, and the end result typically was not very satisfying. Now, when I sit down at the piano, my mind is (hopefully) as empty as the blank sheet of paper on the table beside me. This approach will almost inevitably put me in touch with my deepest emotional state, and/or the emotion that the song that is about to be born wants to convey. When the process really seems to flow, it is as if I am somewhat of a midwife who is there to assist in bringing this new life (song) into the world.
Out of all of the songs I have ever written (and/or assisted in bringing into this world), none has ever flowed as effortlessly as "Truer Truth". And, ironically, none has ever seemed so conspicuously elusive. To describe the process as honestly and vivdly as I can:
"Truer Truth" began as a mysterious and almost haunting melody that I could "hear" (in its entirety) within. So, I sat down outside and alone with my voice recorder to capture what I was hearing. As I did this, I also paid careful attention to what was happening around me and did my best to capture the moment with words. "There is a new breeze blowing... Fall is a whisper away... All of the signs are showing... A subtle change." Staying as open to what the song wanted to say as I possibly could, I continued with this process until it seemed like the song might be complete. Interestingly, there were no words to be found for the chorus. Thus, I started to become frustrated by trying to force the chorus to say something that would bring some kind of "completion" to what the verses had already so effortlessly said. As I recognized the frustration, it started to become clear that it was time for me to stop forcing my idea of what the chorus should be. So, I let go. That was the moment when clarity arrived. The chorus was being inentionally elusive, because this is the very nature of the game that Truth plays with us!
Truth (as I have experienced it) is ambiguous... Life has taught me that every time we think we have finally arrived at some Ultimate Truth, we discover that there is actually a Truer Truth. And when we try to put that Truer Truth in a box and claim that it is the Truest Truth, that is the very moment that Truth herself will pull the rug out from under us so that we fall into the Truth that there will always be a Truer Truth. And when we can accept that this is True, we discover that this is actually very good news!
Thus, my favorite line of the song instantly became: "Though I don't understand it... this Truer Truth". It is absolutely liberating to realize that I don't have to understand everything. And, the song itself became so free and (hopefully) freeing for others in that there is absolutely nothing to prove. "Truer Truth" simply invites us into this pursuit of what is, even though we may never be able to capture that which we pursue. For me, this has become the very essence of the game that Truth plays. If we hold Truth with open hands, perhaps what we will discover is that She is always leading us to new places. He is always inviting us into new adventures. It is always inviting us to dance. They are always asking us if we want to play this game. The alternative is getting stuck. Truer Truth is our opportunity to become unstuck. So may we pursue this Truth, knowing that what we will most likely discover is that there will always be a Truer Truth.